Thirteen Ways to Be a Happier Mom

One of the blogs I read, The Belgexans, is very humorous and entertaining. The mom lives in Belgium (she is from Texas) with her husband and three children. She is very real, and I love her posts. She recently posted on "Twelve Ways to Be a Happier Mom". They were so true! I wrote her and asked if I could re-post some of them, as well as, add in some of my own. She said sure (and added, "even though I really don't know what I'm talking about"). Do any of us really know what we're talking about? :)

So here they are... most are hers, a few are mine, but all are right on (in my opinion).

1. Don't Sleep When They Sleep: I know you'll hear countless people tell you otherwise, but I never feel good after I take a nap. I'm sleepier, grouchier and groggy and my stomach always hurts. Therefore I say never sleep their naptime away, but instead use that time to do NOTHING. I'm serious. NOTHING PRODUCTIVE. Instead, sit on Facebook for an hour, catch up on So You Think You Can Dance. Pretty much do whatever you want and don't feel bad about it. What you should NOT do is clean, fold laundry or organize anything. Nap time = you time.

2. Meal Plan: I am a HUGE believer in making weekly meal plans, then doing weekly grocery shopping. It's seems sort of daunting at first, but once you get used to it, you'll have no idea how you stayed sane without it. No more "what's for dinner tonight?" moments. No more staring into the fridge praying a fully cooked meal will magically pop out okay, maybe you'll still want that. Meal planning is the way to go and takes a lot of stress off. It's a must.

3. Movie while Mommy cooks dinner: I reserve our movie for the day for when I need to start making dinner. There is nothing more stressful than trying to make dinner and having whiny, bored kids clinging to you. When the weather is cooler, I send them outside to play while I cook. But with the weather the way it is now, I put on a movie. It usually works out splendidly because we haven't had the T.V. on all day, and it's something different. And mom gets to cook leech free. :)

4. Have Mom Friends: Preferably you need mom friends who have kids your own kids' ages, but that's not always necessary. But what is necessary is mom friends. I'm serious. You need them. You will not survive without them. If you have mom friends, you are all in the same boat. You'll either go out a night where the daddies can babysit after the kids are in bed, or you just do more kid friendly things. There is really nothing like sitting around in the living room and having all the kids playing everywhere and you are still getting to hang out with your girlfriends. It's fun :)

5. Get Involved in Church/Community: This sort of goes with number four, but you really should get involved with your church by joining a small group. Chances are there are mom groups/family groups that are already meeting a few times a month. You have no idea what that kind of fellowship does for the soul. It will be SO refreshing to get around people of like mind once or twice a month (in addition to church of course) and just drink in that kind of camaraderie. Then as a byproduct you'll also start getting close with other people in your church and have instant "let's go to lunch this Sunday" partners, which leads to more of number 4 time. It's a win-win.

6. Be a Smoocher: I like to attack my kids throughout the day and smother them in kisses till they say some random line like "I'M A MOMMA'S BOY!" or "YOU'RE MY FAVORITE!" They laugh till they can't breathe and it helps me remember why I like being a mom even when they drop a load of stinky poo on the tile floor.

7. Go to Ikea: There are some days that you just HAVE to get out of the house, but the weather tends to be an issue here in Belgium as it rains a lot. So what is a mom to do? Why take the kids to Ikea of course! They have the free children's play area where you drop your kids off and come back for them in like 90 minutes or so. You get to go up to the cafe or peruse the showroom floor while someone else watches your kids FOR FREE. The kids have a blast and you get a break. Does it get any better than that? Then you top it off with a 1 euro ice cream cone for each kid and you become mom of the year.

8. Read: Reading is a great way to get your mind off of things whether they are mundane or intensely stressful. Read, read, read! I think it's good for your kids to see you reading too as it will inspire them to read as well.

9. Have Dance Parties: We do this a lot in my house. A lot. We just put music on and let the kids dance like crazy. The genre always changes: Michael Jackson's Greatest Hits, Jesus Culture, Abba, Taylor Swift, Hits of Broadway, IHOP Prayer Room, Disney, or the ChaCha Slide - it doesn't really matter, but it's fun to push the furniture back, turn the music up loud and dance around with your kids or just watch them dance. It always brings lots of smiles and laughs and that, my friend, is good for the soul and will make ANY mom happier.

10. Make Your Fussy Kid Have Day-Do-Over: I got this idea from my sister who does this with her kids. It works WONDERS on my son who can get in a funk. If they start getting super fussy and/or whiney and everything is the "end of the world" and tears are flowing; they need a day-do-over. I tell Shiloh he needs to go back to bed. I take him into his room (he's normally crying at this point over something that someone did that he felt has irreparably affected his life) and I give him his paci, lay him back in his bed and tell him he needs to spend some time in his room. He can get out of bed and play with the toys in his room, but he is not allowed to leave his room till I come and get him. He cries for a bit, but then chills out and sometimes falls asleep or starts playing or sometimes he just lays there. I'll leave him in his room sometimes for 30 minutes, or sometimes an hour or so. EVERY SINGLE TIME, when he comes back downstairs, his mood is dramatically different. He just needed a day-do-over.

11. Go on a Walk: With the kids in tow, just grab the double stroller, or tell them they can ride their bike and off you go on a walk... AROUND THE BLOCK. Not 3 miles down to the park. Not on an "exercise worthy" route, but just around the block. Because lets be real, if you try to go anywhere far, you'll end up carrying them or their bike back or dealing with a screaming baby and a toddler who keeps saying "I get down, I get down!" but then walks slower than molasses. Then by the time you get home you're tired and you get back feeling overwhelmed and sweaty. But if you just go around the block, the kids still felt like they did something and you're not tired.

12. Lower your Expectations: This was one of the ones in the article I did agree with, because as I've said before, no mom is super mom. Just because your primary function may be caretaker of your children and home, doesn't mean your house has to sparkle at every minute of every day, that every meal is restaurant worthy and your children have had your undivided attention the entire day. YOU HAVE KIDS. It's a lot of work. Some days you're going to rock at being a mom and some days you'll just cry your way through blunder after blunder. Don't be too hard on yourself.

13. Start your morning in prayer: I am living proof that this one simple act can dramatically affect how the rest of the day will go for everyone. It's like getting all your gear on before battle. :)

Really I think that the most important thing is just to be happy with yourself and you'll be a happier mom. I know how "duh" that sounds, but it can be hard when all you do is wipe fluid from every possible orifice on a person's body. It's hard to feel sexy when your body is being used to nourish another human being. It's hard to want to get out of the house when you feel tired just thinking about finding everyone's shoes.

What are ways you stay "happy"?