Oh, January

... I am not sad to see you go.

Does anyone else feel like they've been living in a twilight zone since Christmas? The holidays end, the schedules begin again, the cold sets in, and sickness thrives. I think back on this month, and I'm like, "What just happened?"
I am eagerly awaiting the arrival of February tomorrow. A new month, a sweet holiday, activities already planned, things to look forward to... don't let me down February! :)

This post is very random... random thoughts, random pictures...

I've been re-organizing my boards on Pinterest. That is such a type-A thing to do. But I love it.

Mark is training for a marathon. We are super proud of him. 21 miles that morning. {Also, Jack has taken to not wearing clothes at home. Ever.}

This fella is so unbelievably cute and so incredibly busy. :)

We had an Easter egg hunt the other night. Just because. Well, actually, because we've all been sick and have been quarantined for 7 days. We were going crazy.

Jack loves John Wayne movies. His current favorite is Hondo. And he must be riding his horse when he watches it.

We celebrated my dad's birthday this month. He seriously is the best dad and Pop any of us could ever ask for.

Mini- pancakes. Serve them with a little bowl of syrup for dipping, and your kids will think you just gave them the greatest dinner in the world. True story.

I'm almost ready for Spring. I could use one more really good freeze, so we can have a snuggly, cozy day with movies and hot chocolate.

My littlest man loves books. He gets super excited when he sees them and has them read to him.

One afternoon, Mark and I started looking at Bella's newborn pictures. Mistake. Look how little she was!


Okay, well, this month wasn't so bad. But I'm still looking forward to February. :)

Once upon a time...

... before they started a family, it was just the two of them.

And time spent together was easy. Leisurely. Spontaneous. And then they had little human beings, and the life was sucked out of them time together was harder to come by.

Seeing as 99% of my posts are about kids/being a mom, I realized there's a subject just as important (if not more) as my kids. And that's my marriage. Because it was just the two of us before kids, and it will be just the two of us again after kids.

And if it's already hard to find time together now while the kids are still so young, what are we going to be dealing with when they're older? ... sports, activities, friends... driving them around wishing for a family dinner.

Just as raising kids takes work, being in a compatible, respectful, loving, and understanding marriage takes hard work. And that's ok. If it's too easy, or lifeless, dull, or complacent... maybe we're not working hard enough.

I've written about my mission as a mom... making time for my kids, prioritizing my day, worrying less about my to-do's. I feel such strong motivation to be the mom God wants me to be. But I also feel enormous desire to be the wife God wants me to be. To make enough room in my day for my husband. Because let me be honest. When he walks in the door at 8pm after working a 13 hour shift, the only thing I really want to do is walk into my room, close the door, lay on the bed, and just be still. I'm so tired by that point. And sometimes that is what I do. He's tired too. That's the thing about marriage and kids. You're always tired. Being aware though, that you have to work that much harder to grow your marriage, well... that's half the battle.

Be intentional. Small moments. Small conversations. Small gifts. Small acts. They all add up. They matter. They're important.

I feel like after kids, it's time to date again. Your husband that is. :)

I'm so thankful for examples we've had to observe and learn from... our parents, friends, family... when I see intentional actions to grow a marriage, I try and make mental notes. It hasn't always been easy to feel connected... we fail at times. We go to bed tired and grumpy. We put our kids first. We don't make time. We get too busy.

We are still learning (and will most likely always be learning) how to grow closer, communicate better, serve willingly, sacrifice more, forgive easily, respect deeper, and love stronger... in the midst of life swirling around us. But we must make the time. Because before there were babies, there was just us.

Erika Knox Photography

And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

Colossians 3:14

Max is 1!

The littlest VW turned one this past weekend. Holy cow. Wasn't it just last Christmas that he was a tiny newborn?! It is hard to watch time pass so quickly, but I also enjoy seeing my kids grow and change. And get cuter by the day. I don't know how it happens, but it does. Max still loves looking and pointing at airplanes, so that is the theme I went with for his birthday. He was showered with love from lots of family... only two aunts and one uncle were missing... pretty good when you consider how big both of our families are. It was a wonderful night.

Some fun facts about Max right now...

~ He is walking... started about one week before his birthday, and he couldn't be happier about it.

~ Loves his blankie... his blankie that he chose is a white thermal blanket that was Bella's when she was a baby. It has a pink embroidered heart and Bella's name on it. I may have to take some bleach to that later.

~ Loves his family. As soon as you get him out of bed, he is scanning the room to see who is around to play with. He doesn't know what to do if Bella and Jack are ever gone.

~ Loves when Mark plays the guitar. Clapping of hands, bouncing, squealing. We have jam sessions in our room every night.

~ He currently has 7 teeth. He eats everything we eat and has transitioned to whole milk. I stopped nursing about a month ago and cried for two weeks about it. I do this with all my kids. I will have some serious issues when I stop nursing my last one.

~ He says dada, mama, and a bunch of other jibber jabber I can't decipher yet. He waves hello and goodbye, claps, dances, sings, nods, is silly on purpose when he has an audience... he is tons of fun.

~ He has started shrieking and throwing fits... it's always such a downer when your sweet baby's sin nature makes it's presence known.

~ He knows way more than we think he does... he knows what he is not supposed to touch (Christmas tree, blue ray player, etc), so he looks back at you to see if you see him before he touches it. When he gets his hand swatted, he sometimes gives out the most pitiful fake cry you've ever heard.

~ His hair is still ginger colored. I love it. I don't want it to go away. Red hair comes from my side of the family. My parents had a blonde, brown, and two strawberry heads... Mark and I now have a blonde, brown, and one strawberry.... very cool.

~ Gives the best open mouth kisses... he isn't stingy at all with them, so we snag them all day long. So so sweet.

~ His favorite place to be is outside. He will stand at the back door and scream to go out. That doesn't get old. :(

~ He's not super into toys right now. He can't be bothered with sitting and playing. He's always on the move stirring up trouble. Grabbing plug-ins, playing in the toilet, eating paper, digging in the trash, emptying drawers, coloring on the walls. No time to play with toys.

~ Speaking of drawing, he loves to be given a crayon and paper. He draws on it. He just started doing it one day.


We love, love, love him!!! Happy Birthday Max Palmer!!!

Days

I've had a few bad challenging days. When you come out on the other side of them, it feels so... what's the word... nice, humbling, refreshing. What's my definition of challenging though? Because everyone's perspective of a difficult day is different. For me it is sick kids, exhaustion, frustration, irritability, self-pity. When one day is rough, and then the next day is the same, and the next, and it doesn't seem to get better. What remains steadfast during these days though?
Our Lord's kindness. His faithfulness. His presence. His love. His Word.
The strength of our faith is tested during "bad" days... our true character is exposed in the hard moments of the day. How did I do this week? I failed sometimes. I pushed through and sought strength above my own at other times. And I read this verse a lot.

"And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm, and steadfast."      1 Peter 5:10

I love this. Will Himself restore you. So encouraging. and true. and powerful.

Deep down I know that my days were so incredibly blessed when I compare them to what so many are suffering through in this world. Perspective. It is encouraging and humbling to remember that He cares.

"Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness."     Lamentations 3:22

As I look back at the week, it is easier to see those compassions and mercies.

My sweet Jack was having trouble breathing last week. It was starting to get really scary. I knew something wasn't right. I met Mark at Cooks with him. Diagnosis: pneumonia.

The mercies we saw were... amazing nurses and doctors, immediate medicine, supportive family, lots of prayers, and a reminder that our boy was going to be just find. We were in a hospital with the sickest of the sick kids. And our boy was not one of them.

A few days later was Halloween. Such a fun day! Costumes, good food, family, and friends.

Science teacher, Aunt Megan, brought dry ice. They loved it.

This little guy has had the worst case of teething any of my children have ever experienced. So sad. This has been his "condition" going on 4 days now.

It's pitiful. We've gone through Tylenol, Motrin, numbing gel, teething tablets... just trying anything to relieve his pain.
So what's the worst part? The fact that is a very healthy baby? Or the fact that he loves me unconditionally and just needs to be held 24/7? Why is it so difficult to have that perspective when you're swimming in exhaustion? Things really aren't as terrible as my mind makes them out to be sometimes.

Mark was gone hunting this weekend, and the Lord really worked on my heart and attitude as I cared for the kids and tried to support him as well. He loves hunting, and the kids and I were really pulling for him to get a deer. For several reasons. One being, it would make him happy. Second, the kids love to be a part of it when he gets home. And third... well, let's just be honest here... if he gets one his first trip out, he doesn't have to keep going. :) A tad selfish, yes. But honest.

Well, he got one!

And we were SO happy. We had been praying for Daddy all weekend. And now our freezer will be full all winter.



It's in the tough days that we grow the most. And while it's not fun, it's worth it. Because we come out more dependent on Christ and less on ourselves.


"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."  2 Cor 12:9

Out of the Mouth of Babes

Kids are hilarious. And way more absorbent than we often realize. Ever since Bella was little, I have kept a journal of funny things (or what I think are funny) my kids have said. I want to remember them. Over the last several months, as I have been doing school with Bella, she has said some of the strangest and funniest things. Seriously. Where does some of this stuff come from? I thought I'd share a few Bellaisms... I do realize that most of the time, a child's parent is going to think what they say is way funnier than anyone else. So funny or not, here is a look into Bella's brain...

This one makes no sense. I think sometimes she just likes to hear herself talk. She said this as she was working on school.

~ "This is my slim chance Mom! I don't want my royal concept to be bad."  What???

Offering Bella pumpkin bread, she says...

~ "I'd rather swim a river of crocodiles than eat that."

After muffling a laugh, I sternly replied that a "no thank you" would suffice.

While Bella was working on school, I realized that she was putting arrows over some of the words she didn't want to use. I asked her why she was doing this. She replied...

~ "I'm killing the words with my arrows." That is her father's handy work right there.

Trying to express how tired she was, she said...

~ "I'm just soooo disgraced." Again, she likes to hear herself speak dramatically.

~ "Mom, do you want to hear some 'r' words? ... random, rare, rodent, rambuctious"

Getting ready to go to La Grange with Mark, she says to me (as if I don't know)...

~ "Too bad Max can't come to La Grange with us. He can't have cow's milk yet though, so he has to stay here and get milk from you know where... "   (I'm still nursing) Thanks Bella.

As Bella and I were painting one day, she leans over to me and whispers...

~ "You are one long glorified woman dear" to which I laughed, to which she said "Are you surprised I can say that big of a word?" Oh. dear. Next character lesson? Humility.

Our neighbor came to the door wanting me to buy something for a school fundraiser. Bella answered the door and told her...

~ "My mom is nursing one boy and reading to the other. She can't come to the door right now." Alrighty then.

During math, we were coming up with numbers and giving those numbers objects. Writing the number 300, she says...

~ "300.... hmm... horse droppings!" Super.

This is my girl. And I love her. And I pray for her. :)

Jack doesn't have as much to say, because, I mean, who really can say much around here with Bella?

Anyways. He is pretty funny too. Very matter of fact.

Sneezing and having a great deal of snot (Gross. I know.), he says...

~ "Ugg. I did not know that was coming!"

Playing in a tent, he says...

~ "Come on in Mom. It's snug in here!" I think he meant cozy. :)

When I do school with Jack, I sometimes make him sit in my lap to help him concentrate. I usually have about 10 minutes max with him before he is off and running. One day I was letting him know we just had one more thing to do, to which he replied...

~ "And then I'll be free?!"  Poor guy. :)

This one is for Daddy. Pointing to the sky, he says...

~ "Mom! It's a hawk! Or maybe that's a pheasant. or a dove. or a grackle."

He is very into the word miserable right now. Whether he's miserable or not. It's awesome.

He also has a bit of a country accent, and he is constantly telling a story about "me and my dad". It's so cute. So his daddy's boy.

And not to leave out the littlest VW, he is babbling a lot, and is getting pretty good with mama, dada, bubu (which he uses for alot of things). He also loves to "sing" along with us. I've been taking him into the singing portion of church, and he just loves it. He just bounces and sings his little heart out. His newest thing though, is pointing to airplanes. He loves them. He will be the first one to spot an airplane (we live near a small airfield) and just points and points at it. So so cute.

Well, it is not dull around here. Today I am thankful for things to laugh at. And things to remember.

Happy Monday :)